– You’re starting to forget what it feels like to be truly comfortable. Didn’t lounging on your couch used to feel good?
– You’re pretty much over the whole pregnancy thing. Isn’t it time for this baby to come out already?
– You’re more or less outraged when your due date passes and not so much as a cramp happens in your abdominal region.
– You’re beginning to wonder if it’s possible that your baby could snap your ribs with all that kicking going on.
– You’ve started to think of your boobs as udders. At this point, they’re probably leaking colostrum, and you can’t help but think of yourself as a dairy cow.
– Whether or not you take a trip to the beach, you can’t help but feel a little sympathy for beached whales, because now you know how they feel.
– You panic every time you feel a Braxton Hicks contraction. Was that the real thing? Should you call someone?
– Forget stylish maternity clothes – you actually consider picking up a pair of compression stockings. Maybe they’ll help with all that swelling.
– “Clumsy” doesn’t even begin to describe your movements.
– Every time your nose starts to tickle, you automatically cross your legs, just in case you might sneeze and, subsequently, leak.
– Each time you walk into a public place, you can’t help but wonder if your water’s going to break. Isn’t that what always happens in the movies?
– You can barely sleep at night because of the excitement.
– You take advantage of the fact that you’re about to pop by asking friends and family members to do you favors. They wouldn’t want you straining yourself, right?
– You always feel like you’re forgetting something each time you evaluate the contents of your hospital bag. What could it be?
– You spend more time in the baby’s room than any other room in your house … except maybe the bathroom.
– After your due date’s passed, you start wondering if there’s a fourth trimester no one’s ever told you about. Has anyone ever been 10 months pregnant?
– You’re sick of answering the phone only to tell yet another person that no, you haven’t gone into labor yet. Stop calling!