All breastfeeding and pumping moms need support. And many times, you can find mom-to-mom support through social media groups and forums where help is available 24/7. But what do you need to know before joining these groups? What can you expect to gain from being part of them? And what are the basic dos and don’ts when it comes to advising other moms?
The Boob Group
Seeking Support from Breastfeeding Moms Online
Episode 144, March 12th , 2016
Please be advised, this transcription was performed from a company independent of New Mommy Media, LLC. As such, translation was required which may alter the accuracy of the transcription.
SUNNY GAULT: This Episode of The Boob group is brought to you by, Rumina Nursingwear. Hands free pumping and nursing tanks and bras to support your breast feeding goals. Visit www.pumpandnurse.com and save 20% with promo code BOOBGROUP20
SUNNY GAULT: You’ve heard the phrase “It takes a village to raise a child!” and it’s true. For many moms that village is now online and available 24/7 through social media groups and forums focused specifically on breastfeeding and pumping. But what do you need to know before joining these groups? And what can you expect to gain from being part of them? What are the basic dos and don’ts when it comes to advising other moms? Today we are talking about seeking support from breastfeeding moms online. We are The Boob Group.
SUNNY GAULT: Welcome to the Boob Group! I am Sunny Gault and I am one of your co-hosts for this show and we are changing things up here at The Boob Group. If you did have time to listen to our last episode I kind of explained it a little bit, but we are transitioning and the focus really now is on breastfeeding moms, breastfeeding moms providing support for other breastfeeding moms.
We are kind of creating our own little village here on The Boob Group and we are going to have some fantastic moms on the show to share their personal experience. Everybody has their own background and their unique experience when it comes to breastfeeding and pumping for their babies. And today is no exception. We are talking about seeking support from breastfeeding moms online. So let’s go ahead and meet some of the amazing moms that are going to be part of our conversation today and Jillian, let’s start out with you. Tell us a little bit about yourself and about your experience.
JILLIAN DARLINGTON: Yeah, hi! My name is Jillian Darlington and I’m the CEO of the MomCoApp. It’s a location based social networking app for moms to connect with other moms that live close to them, support groups and to find local resources that they need. And I breastfed my son for about five months until he decided it wasn’t coming out fast enough for him and he preferred the bottle and then I tried to pump for about two months after that. So I kind of know these topics well.
SUNNY GAULT: Absolutely! So Nayeli, hello! Tell us a little bit about yourself.
Nayeli: Yes, my name is Nayeli and I’m still breastfeeding my twenty-one month old daughter Aileen and I’m the first one in my family to breastfeed, so I needed a lot of support, so I turned to Google and for all my breastfeeding needs, available 24/7, so it was really, really…It was huge help for me to have that available. And I learned a lot. And it was great.
SUNNY GAULT: Awesome! Ok, and Sidney, tell us a little bit about yourself.
SIDNEY TAN: Hi! My name is Sidney Tan. I am a stayed-home mom with my fifteen-month old twins and I still breastfeeding them. And I am also an administrator of the Facebook breastfeeding support group Breastfeeding Moms. It is a very big group. We have about 15.000 members, mostly based in Asia, but we have members from all over the World. It is a closed group which means you have to be approved member before you can read the posts. I mostly do content admin which means I have to answer breastfeeding questions posted by the members. But I also do moderations and approving membership.
SUNNY GAULT: Alright. So thanks ladies, for being part of our conversation today. It should be a good one.
SUNNY GAULT: Alright, so before we kick off our conversation today we are going to talk about a new headline that I found online, of course, and this involves a volunteer firefighter who happens to breastfeed her baby. And it was a photo that she took. And she posted it on Facebook and it is getting some mixed reviews. We will go ahead and actually post this on our Facebook page for The Boob Group so that you guys can kind of check it out.
Wanted to get your take on it. Just a little bit of background. So, her name is Angela and this apparently, the mom is Angela, and this photo has been shared as of when this article was written which I was a few weeks ago, it has been shared thousands of times and it was actually taken at a community event, but if you look at the photo it is a mom who is obviously breastfeeding her baby, it has the fire truck in the background, she is in uniform, not completely suited-up, because again, this wasn’t like they pulled up at a fire and she’s like why would that person have her baby there, right?
But it wasn’t like “Oh, let me take a picture, selfie, you know, right before we go into these burning flames!”. It wasn’t like that. It was a community event and she took a photo and shared it. And some people are saying its grouse and whatever. Some people are saying that’s amazing and more power to her. And yeah, you guys have seen the article now. So Jilliana, let’s start with you. What do you think about this?
JILLIAN DARLINGTON: Well, I will tell you what I love about it. What I love about it is its women showing that it’s like “Hey, this is my life as this is my job, this is what I do and in the community, this is what I do in the World, and I’m still an active breastfeeding mom”. And I think, what I kind of stand for in my life is that I’ve incorporated my work-life into my life as a mom and do kind of everything in this mix, and I think it was a great example showing that: “Hey moms , this is how we balance stuff. We kind of just do everything all at the same time”.
I think this is kind of necessary to take away some of this mom guilt that we are all riddled with. It’s just figuring how to incorporate the two. And you know, people are always going to get up in arms and I really don’t understand the whole issue with breastfeeding, with people thinking that like pictures are you know grouse, and you can’t do this! It’s just, it’s kind of those things when I’m just like: “Can we just get over it?”, “Can we just let this go?”, “Is it really that big of a hot topic?”, like “Don't we have better things to talk about?”, you know, like: “Why taking issue with that?”. But what I love about it is the fact that she’s showing like: “Hey, this is one part of my life, this is the other part of my life, and this how they are fitting together in this moment.”
SUNNY GAULT: Yeah, and it does say in the article that the comments were largely supportive of this … I just want to read a couple. Someone says “I love this, so fantastic that these firefighters encourage you to combine family and firefighting with … “, you know which Jilliana is exactly what you are talking about. “It is the best of both worlds”; “Such a beautiful photo. You look so proud”. Another comment – “Great photo. Just shows how dedicated this young mom is … whether it be breastfeeding or fighting fires just to keep us safe. Stay safe and well done! So yeah, a lot of positive support. Nayeli, what do you think?
NAYELI: I love seeing photos of moms breastfeeding. Like I said, I have always been a supporter and a user of social media for breastfeeding and I love it. I think it is reassuring to see … you know, there is another woman firefighter that is going to see this and think: “I am not the only one. There is another one out there”. The more we normalise it and diversify it, the more people are going to do it.
SUNNY GAULT: Exactly. And Sidney, I would love to get your take on this. If there was a mom that posted something … obviously, you’ve got a Facebook group that is dedicated to breastfeeding so I am sure this photo would be approved. But what do you think of this since you’ve got some experience in moderating on Facebook.
SIDNEY TAN: I actually think it is a beautiful picture, I mean, I think we need to normalise breastfeeding. Would it really be a problem if – let’s say the same mom – is bottle feeding her baby in her uniform? I mean, we see lots of pictures of moms in our group posting pictures of themselves breastfeeding in public and I really think it is a beautiful thing and yeah … people just need to get over it.
SUNNY GAULT: Get over it people – that’s the bottom line, okay. Again, we are going to post this to our Facebook page, you guys can check it out.
SUNNY GAULT: Today we are talking about moms reaching out to connect with other moms on social media about issues related to breastfeeding and pumping so all of our moms here either have experience moderating or having some sort of forum where they have to do some moderating of comments that are coming in or just breastfeeding or pumping moms and we have experience using this. So, we’ve got a couple of different perspectives today which I think is really great. First of all, general question – what do you guys think is the general appeal for these online groups for support? Why are moms reaching out? Nayeli, as a breastfeeding mom why did you initially reach out?
NAYELI: I just wanted to … I needed reassurance. I don’t think I had any issues breastfeeding. It became second nature the moment we did it but I needed reassurance; I needed to make sure that what I was doing was right so I turned to them because I couldn’t turn to my family because they … you know, the women in my family had not breastfed so I couldn’t ask them any questions.
SUNNY GAULT: Okay and Sidney … I know you are a moderator of a group but I am assuming you post as well. What do you get out of it from a breastfeeding moms’ point of view that perhaps you couldn’t get elsewhere? Why was it important to you?
SIDNEY TAN: You know, now you can get all sorts of information online – websites and forums – but I just feel like when I joined the group … sometimes I just need a listening ear. I just need people to tell me “Oh, I know. I am facing the same problem too”. You know, I’ve been through the same thing and this is my experience and this is what I do in this situation and I really feel that this is very indelible.
SUNNY GAULT: Yeah, absolutely. Jillian, go ahead.
JILLIAN DARLINGTON: Well yeah, I think what she is saying is so true because I think there are a lot of … like you can search for articles, you can go on baby center, there are a lot of resources out there but it is very different if you have like a trust. Like, if you know who are you talking to and that is what a platforms like Sidney’s, like mine is I am all about actually creating a tribe so you can have that one-on-one connection because I think there is a big difference between reading information and having a real person be able to sit with you and talk with you and make you invalidate what you are going through and be able to relate to what you are going through.
So that is what I think is so important now about being able to connect through these forums or connect through the MomCoApp is to be able to get that kind of validation of like “Okay, what you are going through is normal. I am having the same struggle” or you know, to get that real support because I think that there is a big difference in trusting somebody’s advice when you actually really know them in real life opposed to just reading an article that has been posted.
SUNNY GAULT: Absolutely. And there is accountability too which I know we will talk probably a little bit more when we talk about kind of the downside of the groups, sometimes what can happen, but accountability is huge and obviously you get that a lot in person and you can really develop those relationships even further. So let’s talk about some of the places moms are connecting. Where are the big places, obviously Jillian, apps are huge right now or you wouldn’t have created one, right?
JILLIAN DARLINGTON: Yeah, absolutely. I created the MomCoApp because my village is my everything so I worked my butt off for two years to make my group of mom friends so when I saw the geolocation feature in dating apps like Tinder … when Tinder first came out I immediately started creating MomCo because I knew moms needed something like this; especially in this stay-in age because now with Amazon Prime and everything, we don’t have to leave the house as much and as a mom, not leaving the house it is a nice option but it is also super isolating. It is like we are going to drive ourselves into even more isolation.
I just want to remind moms – you need physical friends, it can’t be just virtual, you really need to make friends and getting to know somebody virtually is awesome and it really saves time than having to go just to the playground and hope that you run into somebody you know, so it is great … Facebook groups or the MomCoApp. You can kind of get to know somebody virtually before you decide to meet up with them in person.
SUNNY GAULT: It reminds me just a little bit of online dating where you can just get a taste to see if you are compatible. Because you might not be compatible with a lot of moms out there so it is a nice way to kind of get to know someone but like you said – you kind of got to make the full circle because at least for me personally, until I actually meet you in person, there is a little bit of a disconnect.
We can have a relationship online and that is fine and that may be all some moms actually need but I feel like, at least for me personally, you are right – going through that full circle and actually making it “real” – I think it is extremely helpful.
So, Sidney, let’s talk about Facebook. So why are people so drawn to Facebook? Is it literally because Facebook is that good of a platform or do you think it is because that is just where we are already and why not? There are groups and we’ve got our Facebook app and while we are breastfeeding or pumping for our babies, we can be chatting with other moms. What do you think the draw is?
SIDNEY TAN: I think you are right. I mean, I know when I was breastfeeding I was always looking at Facebook so it is just an easy way for people to connect to other breastfeeding moms all over the world and even local breastfeeding groups. I have made lots of friends and we have done local meetings and meet ups just from Facebook, it is just such an easy platform.
SUNNY GAULT: So what do you guys think moms need to know before joining these groups? So let’s say mom wants to join, she has her mom friends in person but she is looking for that extra support. A lot of moms I hear really turn to these groups in the middle of the night where you might not want to call somebody at 2 o’clock in the morning, I am sure you can call your besties, it is still fine then, but your besties might not have experience with something you are specifically going through.
So I hear a lot of moms hopping on apps, hopping on Facebook, hopping on social media to get these questions in the middle of the night. So what would you say moms need to know before joining these groups? Nayeli, any ideas as a breastfeeding mom that uses these types of platforms?
NAYELI: I don’t know … like Jillian was saying you need to have the feel for the other side, what they stand for, what is their background because breastfeeding it could be done in so many ways including exclusive pumping so you really do want to know who is on the other side and if that person has a similar background as yours and has the same beliefs and principles when it comes to parenting even.
SUNNY GAULT: Yeah, that is a good point and I would say too that at least with Facebook groups, we can get pretty specific … like, I am a part of a couple Facebook groups, they are very specific for my needs when it comes to breastfeeding or pumping for my baby or a specific issue I have had in the past. And so that is one way to kind of filter out some of that but you are right – with some of the larger groups, it is kind of hard to know who are you talking to. Jillian, do you have a comment regarding that?
JILLIAN DARLINGTON: Yeah, well I think on the flip-side to of like why it’s better sometimes to reach out to a large group, instead of just going to your friends, is your crowd sourcing, we all want a crowd source information because you know a) we don’t want to feel like we are by ourselves, but you know if we are having something and you kind of want to get as much information as possible, that sometimes it is nice to get a lot of feedback and then you can kind of pick and choose what kind of suits you opposed to like just reaching out to you know your bestie, because they might not be going through what you are going through , but if you reach out to 15.000 people, like you can MomsCo Group, or Sidney’s group, you know, you can get a lot, you get a lot of fee back, and I think you can never have, you have definitely have to pick and choose the information that fits you, but I think it’s easier sometimes to get information if you can reach out to a very large group opposed to just you know texting your friends.
SUNNY GAULT: Let’s talk about some of the benefits and even share some of the personal stories of how this has worked for us or perhaps a story that someone has shared with you guys in your groups. So let’s start. Nayeli, let’s go back to you. I know that this has been really helpful for you and what do you find that some of the main benefits are being a part of groups like this?
NAYELI: First of all you don’t feel alone. You know, the forth trimester, you know, the so called forth trimester, is really hard. And you, if you are exclusively breastfeeding, you know, you’re most likely stuck at home with a baby stuck at your breast, day-in and day-out. So having these tools available 24/7, and on the other side there is a real time other moms going through the same thing, you know posting the same, you know, it’s just like I said, it validates your emotions. That’s huge, I think!
SUNNY GAULT: Yeah, absolutely! And the timing of that, I mentioned a little bit earlier, as far as no one knows you are going to need this support, like what if it’s a middle of the night feeding that you are doing and then your baby does something different and you can’t contact your lactation consultant, you know, it’s not regular hours for that, and you know, who are you going to call?
Feel like this is a ghost busters thing: “Who are you going to call?” But seriously, who are you going to call in the middle of the night, right? It’s like you need to have this at your fingertips and a lot of us moms are waking up in the middle of the night, doing all this crazy stuff and then we can’t go back to sleep. So whether it’s a) I’ve got a problem now, can you guys help me with this, or it’s: “Hey, I just happen to be up because I just had to do this for my kid and now let’s chat!” Yeah, absolutely!
So let’s take a quick break. When we come back we are going to talk about when things don’t quite go as planned when we get into these groups. Sometimes comments are made, that may not be intentionally harmful, but they end up being harmful to other people. So we are kind of going to talk about etiquette and what do you do in those kinds of situations, because that's also a very important element when you join these groups. So we'll be right back!
Looking for all-in-one tanks and bras to help you easily transition from bump to baby, Rumina Nursingwear’s pump and nurse collection is designed for your unique body to support you breast feeding goals and your busy new lifestyle. Simple hands-free pumping with no additional straps, hooks or Velcro. Comfortable all day support for busy multitasking moms and convenient full skin to skin nursing. Plus Boob Group listeners save 20% with promo code BOOBGROUP20.
Rumina Nursingwear, simple, comfortable and convenient
Visit their website at www.pumpandnusre.com and save today.
SUNNY GAULT: Welcome back! We are talking about moms who are seeking out there village online when it comes to breastfeeding and pumping support, specifically talking about different apps and different groups they can join online. We’ve been talking a lot about Facebook, it seems there is Facebook for pretty much everything out there.
So I want to talk about the risks, ladies, because with everything you do there are the benefits and then there is the risk, so we’ve talk about some of the benefits, I want to talk about the risks now. The biggest risk that pops-up in my head is judgment. And we get this as moms all the time. You don’t have to be a breastfeeding mom or a pumping mom to know that parents judge, moms are a particular judge, even if it doesn’t come out of our mouths, we are judging, right? Pinterest is the first thing that comes in my mind. Every time I see something on Pinterest I’m kind of: “How does she make her house so perfect? Oh my God, how do I do that?” In that case I’m judging myself, right?
But I’ll be honest, I’ll be on Facebook and I’ll be like: “Why does she have her child on the car seat like that? That’s not the right way to buckle!” or you know: “That latch isn’t right!” I mean, we all do it, right? So the difference is, you know, how do we approach this on groups? Because there is definitely a right way to say this and a wrong way to say this, and I… Sidney, I would love to take your take on this as an admin for a Facebook group.
So, obviously you approve people to come in to the group, not really knowing to much about them, I mean, I’m assuming you’ve had situations when people, someone has posted something, maybe someone posted something initially which is: “Hey, I need some help! This is the situation.” and then the attacks start coming and it they might even not be related to something her question was about, maybe totally unrelated to that. So, I’m assuming you’ve experienced this a little bit, what is protocol when this happens?
SIDNEY TAN: So, we have quite a lot of moderators who are on the look up for new topics and then we also follow the posts, and we just try to stay on top of it. I mean, if we see one post that looks questionable and then we’ll just step in and we are going to put an admin note and say: “Hey, let everyone play nice, we are just trying to help the mom.” If things get out of hand, we’ll close the threat and then we’ll privately message the members. Yes we do a lot of moderating behind the scenes too. Yeah, we try to don’t let things get out of hand, so we’re always on top of it.
SUNNY GAULT: What happens though? Have you had the point, you know, have you gotten to the point when someone had to be kicked out and then? Walk me through it a little bit. I’m always curious about this, you know. How, and I know every group is different, but how many, is it a three strikes get you out or how does it work?
SIDNEY TAN: It is what we do: three strikes and you are out. So, we’ll give a warning at the beginning and then if it happens again and then if it happens again, we’ll have to talk about removing the member from the group.
SUNNY GAULT: And I bet that doesn’t go over very well for them?
SIDNEY TAN: You know, it is what it is. And then we just try to keep the peace in our group and then if one person is consistently attacking other people and judging other moms for whatever reason. For example mix-feeding, I mean a lot of moms mix-feed and this is totally fine, but you know you get moms who come in and get judgmental about it and you know, attack other moms: “Why don’t you try this?”, “What don’t you try that?”, you know, that’s not very helpful.
SUNNY GAULT: And do you guys have this too, Sidney, where usually moderators have some rules posted, I don’t know, Facebook has a note section or something, or maybe they pin it on the top of the group, what the rules are for the group. You guys have something like that?
SIDNEY TAN: Yeah, we definitely do. But the problem is not everyone reads these rules.
SUNNY GAULT: Of course.
SIDNEY TAN: Yeah, but sometimes, if they break the rules, we refer them to the pools and we ask them to re-read it, yeah, that’s a part of our protocol too.
SUNNY GAULT: Jillian, do you have something?
JILLIAN DARLINGTON: Oh, yeah, we just post our terms and conditions, but more than our term and conditions while they are going through our registration process, we post, and from us, it’s selling, we don’t allow any sort of marketing or selling in our forums at all or so whatever, and so we tell them like there is absolutely no soliciting, you’ll be warned, then you’ll be removed. So, we are just very upfront, like: “Hey, if you are coming here to do this, drop now, because this is not going to go well for you.”
SUNNY GAULT: Right, so you have one strike and you’re out … well no … that’s two … so you’ve got one strike so it is like a warning. You had a warning.
JILLIAN DARLINGTON: Well, their first warning is that post. For me that’s their first warning; it is like “Don’t do this” and if you do it, I will send you a message and if you do it again, you’re removed. But we have actually only had to do it once.
SUNNY GAULT: Okay, so that is one side of the camp or people that are being obnoxious, had a bad day, whatever and then hopefully they correct their actions and they don’t do it again. The other side is moms that mean well and how often do we come across this because moms are passionate.
Usually we find something that works for us, we have a tendency to think that it works for everyone or everyone should know our opinion on it. And depending on someone’s background or experience, whoever posted the question sometimes that can come off as very jarring. Because we … to what we were talking about earlier, we don’t know everybody’s backgrounds that are coming into this conversation so we may say something really flippant that we normally only say around friends without really considering who else is out there that might be impacted by it.
So that is the other side of the coin and I think it is a very hard line to draw and how do you guide moms into basic etiquette. So again, we are talking about moms that mean well.
NAYELI: Yes, the one that comes to my mind right away is the comparing game and we know that with the moms that pump and they put their output, pictures of their output, and then moms get so mortified “I can’t do that; that doesn’t seem right”, you know, it is just … I can see that – the comments and I am like “Oh, geez” … always without a fail.
SUNNY GAULT: Oh yeah, because then you are just comparing yourself; you are like “I didn’t pump that much today” and then it is like, you just start to feel like something is wrong. What would you guys say are the dos and don’ts and again, we are talking about moms that mean well? What would you say … maybe some of this is posted in your rules that you have for your app or for your page? Sidney, let’s start with you, what is some of the basic etiquette? If you could tell all moms out there that are getting ready to join a Facebook group specifically for breastfeeding or pumping moms, what would you say are the general etiquette rules?
SIDNEY TAN: If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it. You don’t know the background of all the moms that are posting and it is so easy to judge, I mean, a mom could be having tons of problems breastfeeding and coming online to seek support and then I have seen a lot of pieces where a lot of moms want to do exclusive pumping and then you get all sorts of comments saying “Oh, why don’t you just latch”, I mean, it is not so easy. It is not black and white. So a lot of times, these are just not very helpful so I just think that you must try to put yourself in the shoes of another mom and we are all trying the best we can to breastfeed and it doesn’t come easy for a lot of people.
SUNNY GAULT: Jillian, any advice on etiquette as far as what to say and what not to say?
JILLIAN DARLINGTON: I just think “be kind”, that is my just basic general rule in life. Be kind and I think if we just in a general rule, if you are posting stuff, don’t ever post something that can even be perceived as unkind because we as moms, we are going through so much that the last thing we need is judgment from our people.
SUNNY GAULT: Nayeli, any tips for etiquette as a mom that uses these groups and has benefitted from it?
NAYELI: Yes, just be mindful. Like I said, posting the output or another one is the modesty police, you know “I was able to breastfeed with a cover. I didn’t have to show everything”. Like Jillian said, keep it civil and if you are strongly opinionated, maybe if there is … what is beautiful thing about these Facebook groups, like you’ve mentioned before, is that they have … there are some general and there are some that are focused, so get one that gears more towards modesty or one that really echoes what you stand for or your experience. You always find radical groups in anything.
SUNNY GAULT: What do you guys think about … and I guess it is more of a Facebook comment but directly contacting moms as opposed to posting something in a general group. So let’s say someone posts something in your group or on your app and you have the ability to … basically a private message, which I think you can do with anyone on Facebook although it may go into a different folder for them or whatever if you are not friends with them. But is that better or is that more personal and even more harmful because at least you are not saying it in front of other people?
NAYELI: I absolutely do think it is a great way actually to start a private conversation because there are some stuff … I don’t like always opening up everything to public opinion. Like sometimes, if you are going to talk about something that is more personal or something that you think it would really be helpful but might come off that way, it is better to have that one-on-one conversation with somebody because it is not getting convoluted by other peoples’ comments, other peoples’ opinions. You can say “Hey, I don’t mean this in judgment in any way, shape or form but I did this differently than you are doing it and I had a great experience” and that might not be appropriate for a post but that might be perfect for a private message conversation, absolutely.
SUNNY GAULT: That’s a really good point and I think that is a way to cushion the blow if you will with whether it is a private message or just a general post saying you know, not necessarily commenting on what they did but just say “You know what? I was in a similar situation and this is what worked for me”, because if you do that, you are kind of putting it back on yourself.
You are not saying “Don’t do that” or “Why did you do that, stupid”, you are not criticising them, you are just saying. And we all know like this parenting thing it is not a one size fits all and what works for you, does not necessarily works for me and I feel like that … usually when I am posting stuff on Facebook or people are asking for my opinion on stuff, that is usually how I phrase it … I actually had a twin mom yesterday reach out to me and it wasn’t regarding breastfeeding but it was her babies kept hitting each other.
She was like “Do your twins just constantly hit each other” and it was one of those things when I was like “Listen, what works for my twins may not work for your twins but this is what I did”. And I felt like it was received very, very well because I wasn’t like “Why don’t you watch your kids more often”, you know, it wasn’t a condemnation, it was more like “Kids will be kids and you are more than welcome to try this out if it works for you” but I just felt it was a good way to kind of cushion everything.
Sidney, do you have anything you want to say as far as contacting people directly on Facebook? Any experience with that or do you guide members of your group towards that at some point?
SIDNEY TAN: Actually, we do get a lot of private messages. A lot of members will actually message the admins and just ask us questions in private. We also provide anonymous post service so if a member doesn’t want to post a question in public, we can help them post.
SUNNY GAULT: Oh, that’s good.
SIDNEY TAN: Yeah, a lot of members really like it because a lot of the topics are sensitive in nature and … you might have a friend in there, I mean we have a huge group so some members are worried that someone they know might see their post so they ask us to post and we are happy to do that.
SUNNY GAULT: That’s really smart. So if you have a question that might be a little too sensitive that you want to post, especially in groups that have like thousands and thousands of members, you can always contact admin and see if they will post on your behalf. I have seen that. Jillian, do you have experience with that too?
JILLIAN DARLINGTON: Yeah, actually we are working on a separate forum now that is completely anonymous so it is not tied to anybody’s links. It won’t be necessarily a good back and forth because we don’t want things to get ugly but kind of just like a resource for somebody to put something out there and not necessarily have it be tight to their profile because sometimes you want to vent or say something or ask a question and you don’t necessarily want somebody to know it is you.
SUNNY GAULT: Well, thanks ladies so much for being with us today and for sharing your personal experiences as well as your professional experiences for some of you working in some of these groups. If you are a member of The Boob Group Club, then be sure to check the bonus content for this episode which is coming up real quickly. We are going to record it and we are going to discuss boundaries when it comes to sharing too much information online.
SUNNY GAULT: We have a segment that we call “Boob Oops” where you guys can share your funny breastfeeding and pumping memories and I almost wondered if this is comment that I am about to read was fake because it was just so funny, I guess I will never know but it is still a really funny story, if someone made this up – kudos for you. So this comes from Jessica and she says:
“Lactating lips? I had a breast enlargement and had my lips done at the same time about two years before I got pregnant. The doctor took scar tissue from my areola and placed it inside of my lips. After having my daughter, I tried for three days to nurse her at which time only one of my breasts were getting bigger. So were my lips – bigger and bigger – to the point where I couldn’t talk, barely eat and I had to go around with my hand over my mouth because they were so huge. I talked to a doctor about it and asked if he thought maybe my lips are trying to lactate. He laughed and said it was quite possible that the tissue had retained its memory and yes, needless to say I quit nursing and now my lips are fine again. Lactating lips – who would have thought?”
I mean seriously?
NAYELI: You can’t make this stuff up.
SUNNY GAULT: I know, that’s what I said, you know, if she made this up – kudos to her. She should have her own show if she made this up. It almost seems unreal, can you imagine you lips getting … I mean some people pay big bucks for that you guys. That is funny, oh my gosh, it is crazy. Jessica, thanks so much for sending this in and we all really got a really good laugh at it so I really do appreciate it. If you guys have a funny “Boob Oops” that you want to send into our show, you can send us an email or straight through our website actually, you can leave us a voicemail. Just click on that grey banner on the side that says “Send Voicemail” and you can send it straight from your computer.
That wraps up our show for today. We appreciate you listening to The Boob Group.
Don’t forget to check out our sister show:
• Preggie Pals for expecting parents
• Newbies for newly postpartum moms
• Parent Savers for moms and dads with infants and toddlers and
• Twin Talks for parents with multiples.
Thanks for listening to The Boob Group. Your judgment free breastfeeding resource.
This has been a New Mommy Media production. The information and material contained in this episode are presented for educational purposes only. Statements and opinions expressed in this episode are not necessarily those of New Mommy Media and should not be considered facts. While such information and materials are believed to be accurate, it is not intended to replace or substitute for professional, medical advice or care and should not be used for diagnosing or treating health care problem or disease or prescribing any medications. If you have questions or concerns regarding your physical or mental health or the health of your baby, please seek assistance from a qualified health care provider.
SUNNY GAULT: New Mommy Media is expanding our line-up of shows for new and expecting parents. If you have an idea for a new series, or if you’re a business, or organization interested in joining our network of shows through a co-branded podcast, visit www.NewMommyMedia.com.
[End of Audio]