Teaching Your Kids to Respond to Twin Questions

You’ve heard all the standard comments about twins: “Are they twins? Are they identical? Are they natural? Who was born first?” And you’ve come up with answers to those questions. But what about your kids? How do they respond? Have you talked to your twins about how to address these questions from complete strangers?

View Episode Transcript





Twin Talks
Teaching Your Kids to Respond to Twin Questions
Episode 75, June7th, 2016

[00:00:00]
Please be advised, this transcription was performed from a company independent of New Mommy Media, LLC. As such, translation was required which may alter the accuracy of the transcription.
[Theme Music]
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: You’ve heard all the standard comments about twins: “Are they twins? Are they identical? Are they natural? Who was born first?” And you’ve come up with answers to those questions. But what about your kids? How do they respond? Have you talked to your twins about how to address these questions from complete strangers? Today we here to talk about teaching your kids to respond to twin questions. This is Twin Talks.
[Intro/Theme Music]

CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Welcome to Twin Talks! Twin Talks is your online on to go support group for expecting and new parents to twins. I am you host Christine Stewart-Fitzgerald. Want to know all about the episodes we released so far visit the episode guide on our website at www.newmommymedia.com . And that’s also where you can subscribe to our newsletter to learn all about our latest episodes. If you’d like to listen to these episodes on the go, then subscribe to Twin Talks on iTunes or download our free apps. Here is Sunny with details on how you can get involved with Twin Talks.
SUNNY GAULT: Alright, hi everybody! So we love our listeners! We love the fact that you tune into the show! We love getting e-mail from you! So keep that e-mail coming if Twin Talks has helped you with your twin pregnancy, or triplet pregnancy, quadruplet pregnancy, whatever you’ve got going on! We definitely want to hear that! We love reading those comments! We will even share some on the show. And we also want to let you know that we are looking for more twin parents to participate on our show.
It is really easy to do. You don’t have to get a baby sitter. You don’t have to do very much. All you need really is a computer with a decent internet connection and a Google Chrome browser, and you can participate in our show. So if you want more information on that you can head over to our website at www.newmommymedia.com and there’s a bunch of banners and stuff that talk about it, so click on that. You can submit a quick questioner online and that helps us learn a little bit more about you, so if we are working on an episode we think you would be a good fit for, we can just reach out to you.

The other thing you can do is join our Facebook group where we post all of our topics and times, so can reach out to us when you hear about an episode that we are planning that fits you. So go ahead and check us out!
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Let’s meet the parents joining our conversation today! And tell us a little bit about yourself, your family and you experience with today’s topic. And Jules, let’s start with you!
JULES: Well, hi, I am Jules! I am in Seattle, Washington. My husband and I have five year old triplet girls. Two are identical and one is fraternal, and so we get lots of questions about whether or not our girls are identical, or if they are natural. And this topic is actually very important for us, because since they are five years old and they are going to be going to kinder-garden in the fall, we are going to need to know how to talk about these questions. The most recent one we encountered was at the zoo. I was with some friends and we were trying to enjoy our trip to the zoo, and we get approached by strangers going: are they natural? And it occurred to me, I am like: they can hear you! Do you understand how you asking that make them feel? So, yeah, gets a lot of questions!
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Well, thanks, Jules! Let’s go to Jamie?
JAMIE: Yeah, hi everybody! So my name is Jamie Miller and I live right outside of Washington DC., the northern Virginia area, and I have twin fraternal girls. They don’t look anything alike. And they are two and half years old. One is blonde hair, blue eyes and one is brown hair, brown eyes. And we still get a number of questions and a lot of stares and stranger comments, so I am glad that we are talking about this topic. Because I’ve recently started to really think about my behavior around strangers and what kind of message that’s sending to my girls and how I would want them to behave around strangers. So I am glad that we are talking about this today and I thank for inviting me to the show.
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Glad to have you hear! And Sunny, I mean your girls are on the younger side, but… And then you’ve got, your singles are boys which are a little bit older. So how does that work for your family?
SUNNY GAULT: You know, I can’t really say that we’ve got to do a lot of responding to twin question. I guess I have personally, but my girls, they are a little young, they are just kind of learning how to talk in general. So we haven’t had to deal with this a whole lot, you know, up to this point. But I will say, with my older boys, my singleton boys, this has come up. And I am trying to educate them a little bit about what it means to be a twin, and perhaps even point out other twins out there. Because I am still trying to…I don’t know, teach them that hey, not everybody has, you know, someone that looks a lot like them and was born on the same day. So I am starting to experience this a little bit, but not with my twins, actually with my older singletons.
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Well, thank you Sunny! And for myself, my twin girls are six years old and then I also have a singleton who is three. And I really can say that they are becoming a lot more aware of their situation right now. So I found this topic as very relevant to us right now.
[Theme Music]

SUNNY GAULT: Alright, so before we kick off our episode today I found a headline. And you may have seen this all around the internet, perhaps on Facebook. Quite frankly I think the photo was hysterical, these beautiful twin girls. But what has happened is a mom became very popular after she posted the staged photo of her twins. And basically her twins are in the stroller and they have this sign on them that basically answers any question, any annoying question that people ask you about twins.
And so they are each holding a little sign, they are smiling, they are in their stroller, it is really cute. But some of them are: “yes, they are mine”, “yes, they are twins”, “yes, both girls”, “no, not identical”, “yes, I know they look alike”, “yes, I am sure, they are not identical”, “conceived by f-ing“, “born via c-section“, “do you have twins in your family?-great! They don’t run in my family until now”, “yes, my hands are full”, “yes, triplets would be harder”.
So she’s basically laid it all out there for us. And so she posted it on Facebook. And they are definitely some opinions out there. Some people are saying that she is not being grateful for having twins and the ability to be able to procreate in general, you know, is a beautiful thing, and she is not kind of taking the whole thing seriously. And then I think a lot of people, especially on the twin side, we just kind of get it. We are like you might understand a little bit more if, you know, you are constantly bumped by these questions.
So wanted to see what you ladies thought about this. And did you think it was funny? Did think it was maybe not quite appropriate? Do you understand why people are getting upset online? So Christine, what do you think?
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: You know, I just have to say, I mean this is by a twin mom for twin moms. It was never meant to be like outside in the public for the people that don’t get it. So it is like, it is kind of an inside joke. We, all of us in the twin club, we know exactly what she is feeling. So I think that is what it is. And you know, there will people in the outside that they will just, they will never ever get it. And you know, I mean the kids are obviously too small. They are just signs. So she is just putting a piece of paper in front of them. So it is not like the kids are involved in it.
It is a joke. So to the other people like get over it! That is what I would say.
SUNNY GAULT: Alright, so let’s check with our mammas and see what you guys think. So Jamie, any thoughts on this?
JAMIE: Yeah, I mean, I see where individuals that have singletons or that don’t have kids can kind of see this as a little bit, I guess, flip. I think it is hilarious! Obviously because I am a twin parent as well. You know, I get some really weird questions. Especially the one that always gets me is I always get: well, how do you tell them apart? I am like: well, one has blond hair and one is brunette. But the second you say: yes, they are twins, they automatically, like in people’s heads, they just, they can’t see the difference. I mean, I don’t know what it is, but it cracks me up every time. And I have to hold myself back from laughing, because they are not meaning to be so oblivious to something so obvious. And I don’t want to make them feel bad about it. But inside I am just like: how in the world is this happening?
So I can totally… I can see what people can feel like: well, I have asked this question before, and you know, I didn’t mean for it to sound so, I mean, silly. But on the other side, I do think that for some reason having twins just seems to have this allowance of really personal questions that if you are a singleton parent, you might not experience. Like it is just like: why is my privacy not being as valued as yours? So I don’t know, I can see both ways and you know, so…That’s my take on it.
SUNNY GAULT: And Jules, so you are triplet mamma, what do you think of this picture and how people are reacting to it?
JULES: I thought that picture was hilarious! That lady was every twin mom’s hero! And then I also struggled with infertility for 10years, I get the whole “we should be grateful”. And we are. You know, just because we have more than one baby at a time…We are very grateful! That does not mean we are not humans as well and we don’t deserve our own privacy. So the folks who got offended about it, I have a little less empathy for them. I mean, just because you have pain, and somebody else has bigger pain, it doesn’t mean you are not allowed to vent.
People do not realize how often we get these questions and that people, because they are twins and they are some sort of magical aura to that, they don’t turn their brains on and think about what they are asking us and that some of those questions are very invasive. And they don’t mean to be. And most of the people we have been interacted with are genuinely curious, so you sort of forgive it. But at a certain point you are like: this is enough; I just get my shopping done!
SUNNY GAULT: Yeah, I know, I agree. In fact this article, like I said, this is kind of becoming really popular online. It says the post has been viewed more that 2million times in two days. And by now, I am sure it is a lot more than that. So I agree there is this fascination with twins and everyone wants to ask their questions. But I think, we as twin moms, we can vent too. Especially for a photo that wasn’t even meant for the whole public, for everyone to see.
So cut us some slack, everybody! But we want to hear what you guys think. So we will post this article to our Facebook page, check it out and comment bellow.
[Theme Music]

CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Today we are here to talk about teaching your kids to respond to stranger’s comments about twins. And we are joined by other twin parents who probably have to deal with this issue at some point, either now or in the near future. Let’s see. So first of all, I mean how do you as the parent usually react to stranger’s comments and questions? Do you respond to it? Do you just completely ignore it? Or you make a joke out of it? Or what else? Jamie, let’s start with you?
JAMIE: So I will admit: I am a little bit of an attention hocks. So I am a really proud twin mom. I don’t mind conversation with people and strangers asking and you know, be like: oh, are they twins? That really doesn’t bother me. If the conversation becomes more personal like how are they conceived, or which one was born first, or you know, something like that, that’s when I start to try and veer away from the situation a little bit more. The one that I really do not like and I make it pretty clear, is because my twins look different, usually a stranger is drawn to the look of one twin or another, and they will make a comment about how pretty one is.
They won’t say anything about the other one. And that really bothers me. So I usually you know, step in and say: yes, they are both beautiful, or something of that nature. So I get that a lot and that sets me off. But other than that, I really, I don’t mind it so much and like I said, I am starting to wonder how that comes across to my girls that, you know, I talk to strangers all the time, and that, you know, I allow people to look at them, and is that really sending the right message or do I need to kind of revise my behavior in those types of situations?
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Jamie, I think that’s great that as a parent you are really thinking about the modeling and also just from protection factor of kind of what level of access you want people to hub your kids and how do they see that. So I think as parents it is great that you are like thinking ahead. Because I don’t think…I am usually just very reactive myself. So kuddos to you! How about, Jules, what about for you? What is your usual response?
JULES: It depends on, like you said, the time and day, and what kind of day you are having. And for the most part, I am pretty open about it. I mean, my mom was a nurse and so I will talk pretty much about anything with anybody, if they want to ask me about it. When it gets really, you know, when they start talking about infertility, and such, then it gets a little [inaudible13:07], but…And you kind of have to judge who you are talking to.
If I am in a rush, and I want to get stuff done, I will just kind of not acknowledge them and move on. We were at the Telmuck factory this summer, and I was approached by a total stranger. I was just enjoying the day with two of my girls, and my husband and another one had gone in for something. This total stranger who came up and he is like: are your kids, you know twins? And it was yes, my identical and I am like yes, they are. And he is like: well can I take your picture? No, you can’t! I am sorry! I have no idea who you are!
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Wow! They are taking their pictures! That’s kind of crazy! I mean, now I am just wondering, I know some types in some cultures the picture thing…Like I mean, I know my girls have been really popular with some Japanese tourists. So I don’t know if they were Japanese tourists, but…
JULES: He was Indian, so I don’t know he was American or not, but you know…
SUNNY GAULT: You know, it is funny! We had this happen too, but it wasn’t with our twins. We had that happen. I remember these tourists, we were San Diego, and these tourist were like absolutely obsessed with my middle child who has this bright blond hair. And they were just not used seeing this kind of stuff. So I guess it doesn’t necessarily has to just be twins, but you know…Especially in cultures where you are supposed to have, you are only allowed to have one child or whatever. Like the whole idea of "having two" is different for them. And so I think it provokes this kind of questions.
JULES: Yeah, it totally blindsided me. I hadn’t been asked that before. Most of the time when we are approached, it is a very positive, genuine curiosity. We did try to take them to the fair when they were eighteen months old and we were just minding our own business walking into the fair. And this lady just comes out of nowhere and she is like: "Oh, are those twins? “Let me tell you what I think about IVF…”
SUNNY GAULT: Oh my God!
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Really?
JULES: Oh my Gosh! She went off on us and we, we just walked away.
JAMIE: I had that actually happened to me just the other day. I had the girls in the BJ’s which is like a KASCO, I don’t know if they are everywhere or not. But this guy, you know, was like: oh, you have twins, how amazing, bla bla bla. And then he just kind of stopped and stared, and the conversation just died and then he was crossing ales with me the rest of the time, and I was like: oh, my gosh, this is just so awkward and I don’t…Why he doesn’t just like go away!
Usually is just like a quick: oh, you have twins, oh how do you tell them apart and like ok. But this guy just kind of kept on staring. And it was… That was a little awkward.
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: So do you find that as your kids have gotten older, do you think that the amount of questions or comments has changed over time, since your kids…they are no longer babies?
JULES: It’s less in somewhat, but not a lot. Because usually when I am out and about with them, usually I have all of them with me, so it is kind of obvious. And they all look the same age. I mean, we have one girl who is blondish, and the other two are very brunette and they have longer hair, so you can tell them apart, but it is very clear that they are related and that they are all with me.
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Well, I think with triplets, regardless of age, I mean, they are superstars. So there’s always going to be this immense curiosity of like: wow, three? The three musketeers, I don’t know. You know, I have to say, for my family, my girls now that they are six, I still kind of dress them identically. I should say, I get them clothes, and then they pick up the clothes that they want to wear and usually it is the same outfit.
So they do…It is really clear that they are identical twins and people notice them right away. I mean I will say like when we go to KASKO , you know, we used to having them sitting up in the cart together and that was like…Everyone will just zeroing and like oh, yeah, twins, you know, and the questions too.
So now my girls are usually just like wondering around and I am yelling at them, and so they are not actually at the same place. So there is still curiosity, but it takes people a lot longer, because they will see one playing around, and they will be, you know, turned around, and then they’ll see the other one, and then you can kind of see like: wait, is that the same one, or is that two? And then the questions come. Like oh, they are together, they are twins, oh! So I guess it is more of a delayed reaction now.
But you know, I was just thinking: my girls, they are a lot more responsive and lot more interactive. Now, how about your kids? Now that they are older, do you find that they notice or react to hearing strangers' comments like when you are in public? I mean, are they listening? Are they talking about it?
JULES: Well, mine now would just flat out tell people. Like I’ve noticed Sara just walking around, just going: "ah, we are triplet, we are triplets!" So funny! She is like very proud of it. "We are triplets! We are triplets!”
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: They know three is the magic number. So how about for you, Jamie? How does it work for your family?
JAMIE: I don’t think they know that they are twins. They are just realizing that they are sisters. So we don’t really have that problem.
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: So, depending on your kid’s ages, do you find that strangers are addressing them directly? I mean, how do you feel about that? Do you want your kids to respond to strangers at this age? So how about Jules? Let’s start with you.
JULES: Actually, they don’t. They all still talk to me. And they’ll ask me questions about the girls, or they’ll ask me what they like, or this, or that. And try to direct them, if they are appropriate questions, to the child themselves, because I am like: look, you can ask them who they are. Like a lot of our neighbors still have trouble between Sara and Ashley, and they’ll ask me which one is Sara and which one is Ashley, and I’ll say: well, go talk to them, they will tell you who they are if you ask them, engage with them, it is ok. But yeah, for the more complicated questions, I am still figuring that one out.
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: I hear you! So it sounds like you are trying to give your twins an opportunity for kind of social interaction and introducing them to what it means to have a conversation. But yeah, I mean, it would be interesting if the strangers ask questions like: "oh, how were they conceived?” and “did you use IVF”, and it is like: wait a minute!
SUNNY GAULT: I will say, I have had a personal experience with this. Because with two and a half year olds, you probably not going to ask. I mean, the most that anyone has asked my twins at this point is: “how old are you?” And they still can’t answer that. So like nobody is really probing them for twin questions. But I will say, I have talked to enough experts to know that if we were to ask an expert this question, they will probably tell us, not that we have to take their advice, but they will probably say to be as honest as possible.
And I think for me, I probably would go down the rout with my girls to inform them whatever is appropriate at that age, whatever they need to know at that age. And let them, you know, kind of give the information themselves. Because honestly this is something that they will have to grow up with. Like, I don’t really want to shelter them to just have to just teach them later. I would rather just kind of being honest. I mean, they don’t need to know, you know, about IVF and all that kind of stuff, and if someone asks them about that, they will probably just going to say: “I don’t know what IVF is”. You know what I mean? And that’s fine.
But I think they way I plan to approach it is to obviously be age specific, there’re some stuff that I just can’t…you know, they are not going to understand. But tell them. And then just… They are going to have to face this sooner or later. So why don’t do it now?
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Yeah, I hear you! Well, when we come back, we are going to discuss what it is like to bring up difficult topics with your kids.

[Theme Music]

CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Well, welcome back! Today we are talking with our parents about how to help kids deal with the constant stream of question and comments about being a twin. So to our parents, are there any particular questions or comments that strike a nerve with you? Like you know for example: “are they natural?”, “did you use IVF?” or even “hey, are you done having kids?”
JULES: I will be honest. It does bother me when people ask if they are natural. I don’t mind the questions about IVF, but I do dislike the insinuation that they are not just as normal as any other child. I mean, we have pictures of their baby bugs, of the cells when they split. And it is really cool. They gave us a picture of two eggs that you know, are still forming. And we are like: well, one of those is you two, and one of those is Emma.
So eventually, as they get older, and they can understand those concepts, we will be talking about that. Because we’ve been open about it with everybody else. I don’t see any reason to conceal that from them. But it depends on the context of the people who are talking about it, and whether or not they are insinuating that they are something less than involved with having had to have help to have them. And as far as birth order, we get asked that by the kids in the neighborhood all the time: “who's born first?” And I tell them: it is the same time. Because it really doesn’t make any difference.
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Oh, my Gosh! You know, I have the same thing with my family. I mean, the strangers, you know they ask and they say: “oh, well who was born first?” And you know, usually it is my girls, that they, you know, they bounce back and get: “well, we are twins-we are born at the same time!” It is like duh, don’t you know? So yeah, we haven’t really addressed the birth order topic either. It does kind of make me cringe because we don’t need that extra competition. So I totally hear you on that one. So now, what about the question when you get asked: “are you done having kids?” Especially for you, Jules, with three in tail?
JULES: Oh, that’s a not issue. I love…well I don’t love that question. But it is easy, because we are done! We are so excited to have what we have, because we never thought we would. So we are just in heaven having all these three girls! It has been extremely challenging, but we love it! But then also, as a result of having three at once, I no longer have the ability. And I am fine with that! I am so happy not having to deal with any of this stuff ever again!
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: How about Jamie? How about for you? Do people ask you if you are done having kids?
JAMIE: Yeah, I get asked that a lot. And I have answered one way, and then I have answered another, and then I have answered the first way again. And it really depends on the day and how much the toddlers are driving me nuts. But I do feel like I get judged more on my answer than maybe a singleton parent does. You know like…I don’t know, because one of my reasons is that because my girls were naturally conceived, and were two eggs, which means I am dropping more than one. And now, I am over thirty-five and so the chance that we could end up having a second set is actually higher.
So that was one of my reasons. And I was like: no, I think we are done, I just don’t want to take the chance of having another set, because one time was enough. But a lot of judgment came with that. Like you know: oh, you should not have kids, you know, you shouldn’t try because of that and you shouldn’t do that out of fear. And I just feel like it is not everybody’s business. Like, there are a lot of reasons why you choose not to have kids, but I don’t know… I’ve been judged for that reason in the past before. So now I just kind of say: ah, I don’t know, maybe, maybe not, I don’t know.
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Sunny how do you have conversations with your kids about what to say when they are approached by strangers asking twin questions?
SUNNY GAULT: I mean, I will, I definitely will! I think now I am just more focused on how my boys respond to the questions, because usually they are kind of all four together. And so if anyone is going to address the group, it is probably going to be my older boys that answer because they know how to answer a little. And so I think it is really more about educating their siblings right now, than the girls.
But when the girls are, you know, a little bit older, for sure! Like I said before, I think I am just kind of go the honest rout. And I think they are going to have to deal with it someday. So honestly, it is not something that I am really all that concerned about. Just cause again: they will have to deal with it, so I don’t really have a mamma bear reaction to this too much. I guess because all the questions… we don’t have like anything that really upsets me, you know, when people ask me. So I don’t know. Maybe that has something to do it that I don’t feel like… There’s no… I don’t have any push buttons. Like anything that really stands out.
JAMIE: It is really interesting. One of my girls is pretty shy. And so even with family members that she doesn’t get to see all the time, it takes to her some time to warm up. And you know, we have really tried to make sure that she has her space to warm up, and not try and push her into situations with people she doesn’t feel comfortable around. Because I feel like that’s what going to set her for allowing herself to trust her gut when she is approached, or around other people, later in life, that she just doesn’t feel comfortable around.
Now you know, of course we try and you know explain like: this is your uncle, he is ok. But we do also want to respect her boundaries, and respect the fact that she is not feeling comfortable. And yeah, let her know that that’s ok. So that’s pretty much the length of our conversations or behavior around these types of situation.
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Oh, that’s great, Jamie, that you are helping your kids learn how to set boundaries, and learn who is appropriate to talk to and who isn’t.
JAMIE: Yeah! I think, I mean self-determination is so incredibly important. And kids need to feel that they have 1) control over their body, and 2) control over the amount of information that they share with people. And I think that we, as a society tend to encourage or over-please people, and over-polite people. And I think that leads to some really dangerous situations. And so we’ve just, you know, encouraged our girls to say: I don’t feel like it, no thank you, I don’t feel like hugging right now.
And sometimes they get the communication and sometimes they don’t, I think it is just incredibly important for them to feel: no, I have control over my body, I can decide when and how I show affection towards people, and it is ok if I offend somebody that I don’t feel comfortable with, or I don’t feel comfortable in the situation. And so you know, from a social work background, and a crisis intervention background that is what I would say has made me feel most comfortable with my girls.
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: Well, thanks so much to our parents for joining us today! Be sure to visit our episode page on our website for more information about handling stranger’s comments, as well as links to additional resources where our conversation continues for members of our Twin Talks club. And after the show we’ll talk about awkward moments we can encounter with strangers. For more information about our Twin Talks club, visit our website www.newmommymedia.com.

[Theme Music]

SUNNY GAULT: Alright, so a listener submitted a comment for out “Twin Oops” segment, which I was telling about at the beginning of the episodes. One of my favorite segments that we do. It is where you guys share your funny twin situations, stories that have happened, where you are like oops, that was kind of an oops situation. This one comes from Kathleen G., and she wrote this… Actually I posted something on the Multiples of America Facebook page. And Kathleen responded with her funny story. And I think we can all kind of relate to this. If you’ve ever been taking your twins to a mall type of situation, where there are a lot of people, and twins can easily get lost in the shuffle, this is Kathleen’s situation. So she writes:
My twin boys were 18months of age. I took them to our mall for a mamma and babies outing. They loved water, so as usual we stopped at the beautiful fountains to throw in pennies. Being a young and naive new mom I thought how wonderful to take the boys out of their stroller, and let them throw in pennies and dip their tows in the water. Ah, the pure pleasure of watching new moms and their babies. So I took them both out of their stroller, they both proceeded to take off through the mall in opposite direction. There was one of me, and two of them, and a stroller! What to do? I cannot chase two kids at one time. Time to make a quick plan. I figured James would run in a straight line…
I love her! I love how she like plans this in her head!
I figured James would run in a straight line. Bryan was more likely to ditch in a store and hide on the clothes racks. So I chased down Bryan first, grabbed him under my arm, turned around and tore through the mall in the opposite direction to search out James. As I finally saw him, he was standing alone, looking around…For me? Or deciding which way to run? I noticed all kinds of adults stopping and standing, looking around confused and questioning where is this baby’s mom. And then they saw me frantically run up to him and grab him with another his size, dangling under my other arm. Their all looks of understanding and amusement were quite comical. Think of this: when I got back to the fountain, and stroller, and all the babies’ stuff, and my purse were still intact! Phew!
That’s what she says. So oh my Gosh! Because you have that panic attack of babies running in opposite directions, there is only one of you; you have your purse and your belongings that you can’t take with you, right? And you are almost forced to choose. But I love the fact that she made that split-second decision: ok, who is more likely to go and hide in a store? That’s who I am going after first! I bet if you guys have thought in your head of like if you put yourself in this situation, you would know which kids you will go after first for that very reason.
JAMIE: I’ve been in this situation before and so I run after the one that I know runs faster. Bull I will say that this brings a really interesting point about strangers. It is that I never realized how much I was going to rely on the kindness of strangers. And in these moments of people seeing what is going on with this poor twin mom, you know. And it has revived my faith in humanity how many times I’ve had strangers help because they see me alone with twins, you know, two year olds, and feel my pain. So strangers are not all bad. It is just hard to know which ones are, and which ones aren’t.
SUNNY GAULT: Absolutely! We all to rely on strangers at times, you know. I’ve done that myself. So absolutely! Well, Kathleen, thanks so much for sending this! We really appreciate you commenting on Facebook about this. So we could share this with our listeners. If you guys are listening and you are like “I have a really funny twin ops story that would be really funny to share on the show” we would love to hear it. So you can go on our website at www.newmommymedia.com and click on the contact link there at the bottom, so you can submit it that way.
Another great way, a better way I personally think, is if you again, go to our website and there’s a grey little tab on the side of all of the pages that says: send voicemail. And this is a fairly new system that we’ve been testing and using. It has worked out pretty well. You can actually send a voicemail straight through our website, so you don’t have to actually call a number, but you can use your own voice and tell your story that way. And we will play it on the show. So again, thanks so much Kathleen! And we hope to get more of these stories soon!
CHRISTINE STEWART-FITZGERALD: That wraps up our show for today, we appreciate your listening to twin talks.

Don’t forget to check out our sister show:
• Preggie Pals for expecting parents
• The Boob Group for moms who give breast milk to their babies
• Parent Savers for moms and dads with infants and toddlers and
• Newbies for newly postpartum moms

This is twin talks, parenting times two.

[Disclaimer]
This has been a New Mommy Media production. The information and material contained in this episode are presented for educational purposes only. Statements and opinions expressed in this episode are not necessarily those of New Mommy Media and should not be considered facts. While such information and materials are believed to be accurate, it is not intended to replace or substitute for professional, medical advice or care and should not be used for diagnosing or treating health care problem or disease or prescribing any medications. If you have questions or concerns regarding your physical or mental health or the health of your baby, please seek assistance from a qualified health care provider.

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