I grew up in a family of women – even the dog was female. I have never had any idea what to expect from a little boy. So, when my husband and I found out we’d be parents in 2014, I knew exactly what I wanted: A baby girl. When it was time for my second trimester anatomy scan, I held my breath in that little dark room, waiting for the technician to find the parts I’d been praying for.
You see, I’d pinned so much hope and joy onto this moment that I was doubly afraid for the opposite news. If the tech turned to me and my partner to say, “Congrats, it’s a boy!” what would I do? Would my face betray my disappointment? Would I be a bad mom already because I wasn’t happy about having a little boy on the way? Is it OK to be bummed out in the ultrasound room? Would my kid grow up thinking he was somehow not wanted?
All throughout the first trimester of my pregnancy, I had visions of raising a little girl. She’d wear some of my old clothes – dresses my grandmother had handsewn when I was growing up. She’d play with my dollhouse, my baby dolls, and my tea set. And I’m progressive enough to understand that boys can play with these toys, too, but it just wouldn’t be the same to me. Deep in my heart, I’ve always felt that I’m meant to have a family full of girls.
So, back to that ultrasound room: It was a girl. I cried tears of joy and deep relief. Now, that little girl is old enough that her dad and I are thinking about number 2. And wouldn’t you know it, I’m having deja vu.
At the end of the day, the most I can hope for is a happy, healthy baby. And while I know that I’d love a little boy with my whole heart – and even come back to this article and regard it as rubbish – I still can’t let this thing go. I don’t want boys. I want little girls. Here’s why:
1.) Every toddler boy I’ve ever met has a destructive streak I am just not into. Don’t get me wrong here, my daughter can destroy with the best of them. She’s rambunctious and wild and can make a complete disaster out of any room in 10 seconds flat. But there’s something extraordinary about the energy level of a little boy. To that I say, no thank you.
2.) You know that old saying “A daughter’s a daughter all the days of her life; a son is a son until he takes a wife”? Deep in my heart, I want to say it’s archaic, but is it? If I have a son, and he grows up and has a family of his own, will he forget all about me? I’m too emotionally needy for that.
3.) I want to raise sisters. I want my children to have the same loving, close-knit bond my sisters and I have. Can you have that with sisters and brothers?
4.) Names for boys are either seriously boring (e.g. Thomas) or way too trendy and weird (e.g. Duke). There seem to be so many more options when choosing a girl’s name.
5.) The clothes. Do you know how fun it’s been to dress a baby girl? I don’t think you can say the same for a little boy.
So, what do you think? Are you leaning towards one gender or the other for your little one? Do you think my logic here is crazy? Weigh in and share with other moms-to-be in the comments section below.